Day 10: Orphanage Visit

We felt drained the day before.  It was just a day that felt hard.  We went to bed tired.  And slept.  Everyone slept.  Ian even slept in! Till 7pm!  He's been on a routine for years I'd imagine.  And for school, too, he gets up early.  I think we all woke up feeling more rested.  We headed down for breakfast and Lily was complaining of a scratchy throat.  Phil told her she could have tea, hot milk, or coffee.  She laughed.  Then she said, "really?"  He said sure so she picked coffee.  LOL  

He came back with 6 parts hot milk 1 part coffee.  She told him he made it too strong.  HAHAHAHAHA!

We went upstairs to our apartment and prepared for the day.  We were pretty disappointed about the plan for the day because we had told our agency that we wanted to do the bullet train to Baoji since it was much faster and cheaper and would allow us to be in Baoji longer.  As it was, it was a 2 1/2 -3 hour van ride there and then the same trip back on the same day.  6 hours in the van is long plus it ate up so much of our day.  Anyway, it is what it is.

We were able to be in Baoji to have lunch, tour the orphanage and foster family, and go see the front gate of Ian's school.  (More about that later.)

Anyway, we prepared for the day, which meant backpacks with activities, baby carriers, diaper bag, 12 gifts for different people, and some electronics and candy.  Unfortunately, I forgot the bag of candy and snacks in the kitchen, so that was super.... (sarcasm).  As far as gifts we brought:

Nicola: medicine for her dad, a leather bound Jesus Calling book, vitamins for her mom, Barres Brothers coffee, a "Count your blessings" coloring book and colored pencils

Ian's foster family: Ikea backpacks, duffles bags, ponchos, and grocery bags, Pure shea butter soap, a really nice lotion

Ian's foster siblings: ping-pong balls, candy, two different games of matching cards, a minion toy, and a baymax toy

The director in charge of setting up Ian's child care and tutoring: a bracelet set

We also took things to Nicola for two kids she's tutoring who have families coming for them.

We also took the instant camera and film so that Ian could take pictures with people and leave the pictures with them.  That was one of the best decisions of the trip.  The other best decision, I'll share in a different post.  He has loved taking pictures of us and enjoyed leaving pictures with his foster siblings.  He periodically throughout the day will go and sort through his pictures of us.  He has quite a stack now.  

We made a pit stop on the way to Baoji for people to use the bathroom.  Everyone has mastered the squatty potties.  On the trip, I noticed that the kids have some bug bites.  I'm thinking that they are mosquito bites, but I'm praying that I'm accurate and not missing something.  Lily typically swells up pretty big with mosquito bites and hasn't with these, which is odd (now that I'm writing this blog post, she did actually swell quite a bit and need benedryl, so I'm more confident that they have just gotten bites from mosquitos).  

As we pulled up to Baoji, Ian got really animated - he was SUPER excited!  We gathered all of our things, packed up the backpacks, and got our big bags of gifts and got out.  I carried Jemma, who had fallen asleep from the dramamine I'd given her half way through the drive when she wanted a bottle, and Ian led us around (not exactly sure where we were going... seemed like we should have been going to the front entrance... but whatevs).  We met Nicola right outside the parking lot - SO wonderful to meet this woman!  

Celine called Mr. Bai and asked where we were meeting him and then we headed to the front entrance.  He was standing in the doorway and came out of the building to meet us.  He shook all the kids hands (we had them shake his hand after Ian's adoption was finalized) and greeted each child - so sweet.  He was with a photographer (I think) and the apartment manager for the foster families.  They led us to a conference room where we put down all of our stuff and had water.  

After we had some time of greetings, our hosts walked us to the lunch that had been prepared.  A giant round table with large slowly spinning susan was in a room just for us.  There was a dumb waiter which I've never actually seen in person being used so that was fun!  Food was laid out around the lazy susan and we started to take pieces.  Phil went to the other side of the table to dish up the girls and Titus.  While he was doing this, Phoebe had tried to pick something up with her chopsticks and must have dropped it or it slipped or something.  She looked ready to shatter.  I noticed her face (but hadn't seen what happened) and said, Phoebe, are you okay.  She came running over and buried her head in my neck and sobbed.  I consoled her and then we moved the seats around so Phil was sitting over in her spot and she was sitting next to me.  A few minutes later, a server quietly entered the room with a small silver plate and a teeny fork and spoon on it.  He handed it to Mr. Bai who passed it over to Phoebe.  His smile was so kind.  He had noticed what the problem was and why she was so embarrassed.  She said xie xie and he gave her the biggest grin!  I'm so glad this was the man who was in charge of the orphanage where our son has lived for 13 years.  

In the middle of the meal, Nicola was talking with Ian and announced that Ian had just told her that Titus was his favorite.  LOL - we'll teach him over time how a family works.  

The food was SO good.  I think Sammy and Jemma ate the whole plate of apple slices themselves.  After the meal... or what I thought was after the meal, out came bowls of noodles for each person.  I could not even dream of eating another course.  Ian slurped his up next to me.  Surprisingly, or because I asked people to pray about this specific thing, Ian's slurping hasn't bothered me at all.  (And he sneezed four times yesterday blowing his germs any which way direction he pleased and I wasn't the one who lost my mind over it.... which I actually do typically.)

After the meal, we went back to the room and were presented with a gift from the orphanage.  We were able to tell Mr. Bai and the other orphanage staff how much we appreciate their care.  Mr. Bai said he prepared Ian's paperwork years ago and he waited so long.  

Next we went on a tour of the orphanage and Ian's foster home.  He lived with a wonderful foster family - 4 other boys and 2 girls.  He was literally sprinting down the hallway to greet them!  The oldest girl was clearly a good friend to him.  When we walked into the apartment, all the kids were lined up on seats watching a show.  There was another visitor there from another foster family, too.  We were so busy and excited to meet the people that we really took very little time to look around.  We didn't even see the whole apartment.  However, Ian went straight to his old bedroom and showed us where he slept and who his roommate was.  He showed us his part of the closet.  We also went out on the enclosed balcony to see where all the tutoring and studying took place.  Amazing view and so special to be able to see the place Nicola has ministered to our son for so many hours.  

We told Ian he could give the gifts to the siblings.  Without even looking in them, he passed them out in a row (there were boy gifts and girl gifts but who cares I guess).  It is customary to open gifts in private so the gifts were all taken and set on the entertainment center for later.  We then had Ian sit on the couch with the family and take pictures and then all of us took pictures together.  I will treasure this time, albeit too brief, that we were able to spend with this family.  Honestly, if I were to do it again, I would have asked for more time (I mean, we did ask for more time several times and our agency assured us we'd have the whole day, but I mean ask for more time in that moment).

After we left the foster home, Ian ran back in and grabbed the red bag he was responsible for carrying.  LOL - his foster sister/friend tried to stop him, but it wasn't until I said that was the gift for the foster parents did he realize his mistake.  He chuckled and gave it back and the foster sister said thank you in English.  She spoke more words in English than we've heard Ian say all week!  We aren't pushing any English right now, but soon, I will start to have Ian say words in English.  For now, he just grunts and exclaims and says NO very clearly.  

We walked down the hallway and went to visit another part of the orphanage... the baby room.  Oh. My. Word.  I'm not sure how to put it into words... I'll try to describe.  

This room was all toddlers... adorable bright eyed toddlers.  They had all just gotten up from naps and the nannies had put them all on little potties that lined three of the walls of a potty room off of the crib room.  There were three sections of this - a crib room, a hall way with a large open potty room on one side and wash/work room on the other and then a large play room in the third section.  So all the babies were on potties except for one boy who was standing watching us in his crib and one baby who was crawling through the hallway and one little girl who stood watching us.  The boy in the crib, come to find out, had been stolen.  He is staying there while the authorities try to find his parents.  Such a heartbreaking reality.  So unbelievable!  

Sammy and Titus got right down on the floor with the little one crawling out of the hallway.  Sammy and Jemma wanted to say hi to all the babies in the potty room - lol.  No one is shy in either group evidently.  Lily was very quiet and uncomfortable.  It is hard the first time you go into a baby room like that... what do you do and how do you act seeing all those cribs and all those babies.  How do you even begin to respond or process that?  Especially when you're nine.  I think Lily found it unsettling.  I think Phoebe found it inspiring.  Phil said, "it's hard to see all this and ever say we're done."  So, all of us need to continue to trust the Lord.  In everything.  

After that, we saw the laundry area and a training area and honestly the facilities are so nice.  We asked Mr. Bai why Ian was kept in the orphanage until 2012 instead of moving to the foster home at an earlier age.  It is because they didn't exist before then.  He has done a lot for the orphanage and continues to make huge impacts.  We walked over to a wall of pictures - children with their families who've been adopted or children in the orphanage doing cool things.  The two little boys were messing around so I had one sit on one side of a giant column and one sit on the other and told them not to get up until I told them to, and Mr. Bai said I was a good mom.  That was nice because with Sammy, I longed for months to get back in contact with Sammy's orphanage, feeling the need to tell them that Sammy was okay and we were doing our best.  Walking away from Ian's orphanage, I feel like Mr. Bai and the other staff were happy with Ian's family.  

We all walked out to the van and said our good-byes.  I hugged them and got in the van.  Mr. Bai said some things to Ian and waved and said good bye to each of the kids, too.  Then we drove away.  It was a moment.  I hope I never forget.  I urged Ian to look out the window and wave to them as they stood waving.  He whipped around and waved - so happy.  They made saying good-bye about him, his healthy bonding to us, and not about them and missing him.  What sacrifice.  Smiles, cheer, pride, congratulations... that is what they heaped on him.  Not tears or sadness or longing.  

We drove to Ian's school and we had to all but shout to keep him in the car and from running across the busy street without even looking.  Such a middle schooler - one-track mind!  He wanted to show off his family to everyone.  AND BOY, THAT WAS WILD!  

We all crossed the street and he started to greet a couple people.  There is a large gate in front of the school and we were on the outside of it while all the kids were coming back from a noon break.  Clearly the principal or someone in charge was trying to herd the kids back to their classes, but he was WAY out numbered.  CROWDS of children quickly gathered and several children called out to Ian like he was a movie star.  LOL.  It was pretty hilarious watching this bashful kid all of a sudden be the superstar.  He basically ignored most of the calls and just searched out a couple people.  After a few minutes of near rioting, we took our picture and then got back in the van because we were causing a ruckus for the teachers who couldn't get any of the kids to go inside.  A teacher showed up at the van wanting to take Ian's picture with all of his class before he left.  The guide was going to take him inside for it, but I asked if Phil could go with him to at least see the class and take a picture. The teacher said yes and Phil and Ian went to the class.

I got to sit in the van with Nicola to visit a little while longer.  She had come with us in the van to the school so she could be with us longer and then just planned on catching the bus home.  We had already given her gifts and things for the other kids she tutors and special treasures, too, but this was SO nice to have the extra time just to sit and talk.  

Once Phil and Ian and Celine came back, we had to leave and Nicola said good-bye to us once again and we started for home.  We only made one pit stop this time and people most rested and reflected the whole way home.  They also worked on their activity books that Phil had picked up the day before when we found out we were not taking the bullet train but doing the 6 hours in the car.  He's such a good dad.  

Once we got back, Phil got pizza and the kids just played and showered and went to bed.  It was a long, beautiful, joy filled day!  

 2nd camera: